So I'm reading Maddox's "How To Kill Yourself Like A Man" and got to 'Hold Your Breath.' He states the following:
What you need: balls.
How to do it: this is similar to strangling yourself, but the difficulty level is hard. Harder than a priest at a playground.
Right there I fell off my chair, tears streaming, and maybe a little pee even came out. Holy shit was that funny, pun intended.